RENAISSANCE

RAPHAEL PAINTS A RED-FACED APOSTLE

                When the artist Raphael was working on his Vatican frescoes, two pompous Cardinals came to see the paintings.  When they sniffed that one of the faces of an Apostle was too reddish, Raphael responded:  “He blushes to see into whose hands the Church has fallen.”

                –  Hume 77

SISTINE CHAPEL FACTS

  1. Pope Julius II commissioned the work. He was a difficult boss to work for, being known as “Il Papa Terribile”.  He intended the painting to be part of his beautification of Rome.  It was partly intended to glorify himself and make him superior to the previous pope, his rival Pope Alexander VI.
  2. The ceiling is 131 feet by 43 feet. In all, Michelangelo painted around 5,000 square feet.
  3. There are 300 painted figures. The scenes are from the Book of Genesis.  He also painted prophets and sibyls who predicted the Messiah.
  4. Michelangelo considered himself to be a sculptor. He had not painted since he was a student.  These were his first frescoes.  And yet, he attempted one of the more challenging fresco techniques. He had to learn on the fly.  Getting perspective right on a curved structure was particularly hard.
  5. Julius II convinced Michelangelo to take on the project by promising him he would be hired to do 40 huge statues for his tomb.
  6. Michelangelo started in July, 1508 and was finished in October, 1512. There were various setbacks, like the Pope’s health.
  7. Michelangelo did not paint lying down. That myth was perpetuated by the movie “The Agony and the Ecstasy”.  He did paint on a scaffold and sometimes he had to bend backwards and paint over his head.  This actually caused some permanent vision problems.
  8. Michelangelo had assistants to do things like mixing paint and preparing plaster. They did some minor painting, but Michelangelo did the vast majority of the painting.

https://www.thoughtco.com/the-sistine-chapel-ceiling-by-michelangelo-183004?utm_campaign=wilat&utm_medium=email&utm_source=cn_nl&utm_content=18563174&utm_term=

THE SIX WIVES OF HENRY VIII

  1. Catherine of Aragon – Henry became king at age 17 in 1509.  Six weeks later, he married his brother Arthur’s widow.  She was 24.  She was the daughter of Ferdinand and Isabella.  She had Mary in 1516, but had several failed pregnancies which increasingly angered Henry, who was obsessed with having a male heir.  That was her only fault as she otherwise was a good wife and Henry loved her until the frustration got the best of him.  In 1519, he had an affair with Elizabeth “Bessie” Blount and she had a son named Henry Fitzroy, his only documented illegitimate child.  Henry asked for an annulment based on Catherine consummation of her marriage with Arthur, which she denied.  When the Pope denied it, preferring to offend Henry instead of Spain, Henry created the Church of England and gave himself a divorce.
  2. Anne Boleyn –  Henry had a brief affair with her sister.  Anne played hard to get and insisted Henry divorce his wife before going to bed with him, she eventually relented based on the promise of a divorce.  Henry married her soon after the divorce in 1533.  She had Elizabeth the same year.  She promised Henry a son, but after several stillborns, he decided to move on.  She was beheaded for adultery in 1536.
  3. Jane Seymour – Days after the death of Anne, he married Jane.  She had been a lady-in-waiting for his first two wives.  They started an affair that enraged Anne, who saw the hand-writing on the wall.  In 1537, Jane gave him the son he craved –  Edward, who was not worth the wait.  Unfortunately, this perfect son-bearer died several weeks later from complications.  She is buried next to Henry.
  4. Anne of Cleves – In 1540, a bright adviser thought it would be a great idea for Henry to make a political marriage to one of the daughters of Germany’s Duke of Cleves.  He showed Henry portraits of both daughters and Henry chose Anne.  When she arrived in England, Henry discovered the portrait had been photoshopped and he very reluctantly went through with the wedding with a scowl on his face.  After six months, he divorced her, but she got a nice settlement and probably never had to sleep with the increasingly gross king.  She was by far the luckiest of his wives.
  5. Catherine Howard – The vivacious 19-year-old captured the eye of the obese ex-playa when she was a lady-in-waiting for Anne of Cleves.  They married in 1540 and although 49-year-old Henry could not keep up with her, he was quite upset when she looked elsewhere for fulfillment.  She was beheaded for adultery and treason in 1542.  Unlike Anne Boleyn, she was guilty.  And incredibly naïve.
  6. Catherine Parr – In 1543, Henry married for the last time.  She was a return to a Catherine of Aragon style of wife.  She put up with him in his trying later years.  She was a good stepmother and even convinced him to restore Mary and Elizabeth to the line of succession.  She saw to their education.  She also was very influential in court culture, religion, and the improved role of women.  She died a year after him, in 1548. 

https://www.history.com/news/henry-viii-wives

BATTLE OF LEPANTO

  1. It was fought on October 7, 1571 off the coast of Greece. The site was near the similarly decisive Battle of Salamis. 
  2. It was between the Holy League and the Ottoman Empire. Pope Pius V had set up the Holy League to defend Christendom against the Islamic Ottomans.  The alliance included the Papal States, Venice, and the Spanish Empire ruled by Philip II.  The war was symbolized as the cross versus the crescent.
  3. The Christian fleet was led by Philip’s half-brother Don Juan of Austria. He had over 200 galleys with around 40,000 sailors and oarsmen.  Many of the oarsmen were convicted criminals.  The ships carried 20,000 soldiers, many of them elite Spanish infantry.
  4. The Ottoman fleet was commanded by Ali Pasha. He was son-in-law of Sultan Selim II.  His fleet was 222 galleys and 56 galliots.  He had 37,000 oarsmen and 34,000 soldiers, some were elite janissaries.
  5. The Christian fleet had less ships, but more cannons (1,815 versus 750). Its soldiers were armed with arquebuses and muskets.  The Muslims used the composite bow which fired poisoned arrows.
  6. Both fleets were organized into right, center, and left divisions which paired off with their opposite division. The battle began after Ali Pasha fired two cannons, the traditional signal that he was offering battle.  Don Juan responded.  Ali Pasha raised the “Flag of the Caliph” which was a huge green banner embroidered with verses from the Koran and the name Allah 28,000 times.  Don Juan was rowed through his fleet to inspire his men.  Priests anointed the men and gave them communion.
  7. Each Christian division had two galleasses stationed in front. These were basically floating fortresses that were loaded with cannons.  As the Turks advanced, they were pummeled by the galleasses.
  8. Although cannons were used, the battle was a traditional ramming and boarding battle. The focus was on the two flagships which became locked in a fierce battle.  Each side tried to board the other more than once.  Other galleys fed reinforcements into the fight.  The climax came when Don Juan himself led an assault.  Ali Pasha, spying his foe, advanced to meet him in what would have been a Hollywood moment except Ali Pasha was wounded by a bullet and fell amongst his rowers (most of whom were Christian slaves) and one grabbed a nearby sword and beheaded the admiral.  The battle on the Christian left wing turned when Christian slaves rowing for the Muslims armed themselves and attacked their masters.
  9. Don Juan won a complete victory. The Turks lost 40,000 men.  117 ships were captured and 50 were sunk or destroyed.  Only 13 Christian ships were lost.  The battle was a turning point in Muslim expansion in Europe.
  10. Miguel Cervantes, future author of “Don Quixote”, was wounded in the arm in the battle.

https://www.warhistoryonline.com/medieval/battle-lepanto-naval-battle-saved-europe-ottoman-empire.html

–  The Battle of Lepanto by Robert Marx

FACTS ABOUT THE CEILING OF THE SISTINE CHAPEL

  1. In 1508, Pope Julius II convinced Michelangelo to stop work on his tomb and paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.  The building is the chapel in the Apostolic Palace in the Vatican.  The ceiling was originally painted sky blue with gold stars.  Michelangelo did not want the job.  He considered himself a sculptor, not a painter.  He had never painted a fresco before.  He accepted the commission reluctantly and his working relationship with Julius was tense.
  1. It took four years to complete. It was opened to the public on Nov. 1, 1512.
  1. The ceiling is 12,000 square feet. Michelangelo filled it with over 300 figures.  He did not paint them laying down.  That myth was mainly due to Charlton Heston’s depiction of Michelangelo in the movie “The Agony and the Ecstasy” (1956).  He designed the scaffolding himself.
  1. The Pope suggested l2 large figures of the Apostles, but Michelangelo insisted on having control of what he painted. He decided to go with scenes from the Book of Genesis for the main part of the ceiling.  Here are the nine scenes from back to altar:

                –  Noah is drunk and disgraced

                –  The Great Flood

                –  Noah makes a sacrifice after the Flood

                –  Adam and Eve are tempted and evicted

                –  God creates Eve

                –   God creates Adam

                –  God divides the water from the land

                –  God creates the sun and the planets

                –  God creates light from darkness

  1. The most famous scene is God creating Adam. Michelangelo’s God created our image of him as an old, bearded man.  It is theorized that the background for God is a brain, indicating the gift of intelligence.
  1. The ceiling held up extremely well over the centuries with the small exception of a panel showing Noah escaping from the Flood which fell due to a gunpowder explosion at a nearby depot in 1797.
  1. The ceiling underwent renovation from 1980-1999 to remove soot and grime. It also removed fig leaves and loin cloths added under the prudish instructions of Pope Pius IV in the 1560’s.

https://www.history.com/news/7-things-you-may-not-know-about-the-sistine-chapel

https://graylinerome.com/blog/15-fascinating-facts-about-sistine-chapel/

https://www.incredibleart.org/links/sistine-chapel.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sistine_Chapel_ceiling

BUT STILL IT MOVES

                In 1632, Galileo published his Dialogue on Two Chief World Systems which supported the Copernican theory that the sun was the center of the Universe and the Earth moved around it.  The book caught the attention of the Inquisition which summoned Galileo to Rome for trial.  Under threat of torture, Galileo was forced to recant and was put under house arrest for the rest of his life.  According to one version of the story, as Galileo arose from his knees, he muttered:  “But still it moves.”

                –  maroon 20

NOW I’VE SEEN BOTH SIDES

                In his book Utopia, Thomas More wrote that before they married, couples should see each other naked so they would avoid disappointment.  One day, a friend named Sir William Roper asked More for the hand of one of his daughters in marriage.  When Roper mentioned More’s piece of advice about seeing your betrothed naked, More led him upstairs to the daughters’ room.  The girls were asleep on their backs in the same bed in the nude.  More whipped off the cover and the awakened girls quickly turned onto their stomachs.  Sir William proclaimed: “Now I have seen both sides.”  He married the older daughter, Margaret.  I don’t think he returned the favor.

                –  maroon 22

THE SEXY DUCHESS OF URBINO

                Titian was one of the greatest of the Renaissance painters.  He, rather than the sculptor Donatello, should have been one of the Ninja Turtles.  He specialized in mythological subjects and portraits.  He would accept commissions to paint famous people.  One time, the Duke of Urbino came to him wanting a portrait of his wife.  In the nude.  This was going to be a problem because the duchess was old and not beautiful.  Titian was worried about the effect of an accurate portrayal.  His good friend Pietro Aretino suggested a solution.  Pietro, who was a poet and wit, told Titian to hire a prostitute to pose for the nude body and then he could paint the Duchess’ idealized head on the body.  When the painting was unveiled for the Duke, he immediately figured out what had happened.  He remarked:  “It I could have that girl’s body, even with my wife’s head, I would be a happier man.”  The statement was so funny, Aretino suffered a stroke and died on the spot.

                –  maroon 26

THE COURTLY FART 

                The Earl of Oxford attended Queen Elizabeth’s court one day and as he bowed low before the monarch, he broke wind.  He was so embarrassed that he stayed away from the court for several years.  When he finally returned and approached the Queen to bow again, she said:  “My lord, I had forgotten the fart.”

                –  maroon 32

CATHERINE de’ MEDICI

                Catherine was the daughter of Lorenzo the Magnificent who ruled Florence.  She was orphaned when both parents died within weeks of her birth.  When her family was overthrown at age 8, she was taken hostage and shuffled from nunnery to nunnery.  She was rescued by her uncle Pope Clement VII.  She was married at age 14 to a French prince who would become Henry II.  He only had eyes for his mistress and she had no children for the first ten years of their marriage.  She turned to necromancy and astrology to have ten kids, but all were sickly.  She patronized Nostradamus.  She had a vision of her husband’s death jousting, but she could not convince him not to compete.  She wore mourning cloths for the rest of her life. She acted as regent for her son Francis II.  When he died, Charles IX took over.  During this period, France was wracked by religious warfare between the Catholics and Protestants (called Huguenots).  Catherine actually tried to work out compromises, but she misread the fanaticism of both sides.  When Huguenots came to Paris for the marriage of her loose daughter Marguerite to the Huguenot leader Henry of Navarre, she convinced Charles to wipe out the leadership of the Huguenots.  In the St. Bartholomew’s Day Massacre, Catholic forces slaughtered not just the leadership, but many civilians.  It was a black stain on her reputation.  She continued to be a force behind the throne when her third son Henry III became king.  Henry was a homosexual who his mother had tried to convert by giving him a banquet served by naked servants.  Mission not accomplished.  Henry had no children and the Valois Dynasty came to an end.  Ironically, Henry of Navarre became the new king.  Catherine outlived all but one of her kids and saw three sons become kings and two daughters become queens.

–  Amazing  pp.  399-400  /  https://www.encyclopedia.com/people/history/french-history-biographies/catherine-de-medici

THE THEFT OF THE “MONA LISA”

                In the early 1500’s, Leonardo Da Vinci painted a portrait of Lisa Gherardini, the wife of an Italian noble.  It became known as the “Mona Lisa” and is now the most famous painting in the world.  People ask what makes it such a masterpiece.  Some point out the eyes that seem to follow you wherever you are.  Others argue it is the enigmatic smile.  You can argue why it is a masterpiece, but the reason it is the most famous painting is due to an incident on Dec. 12, 1911.  The day before, an Italian handyman (and petty criminal) named Vincenzo Peruggia entered the Louvre to work on installing glass cases for art works, including the Mona Lisa.  He hid in a closet when the museum closed and removed the painting from its frame.  Hiding it under his coat, he walked out the next day.  He hid it in a trunk in his apartment.  It took 24-hours to even notice it was missing.  It was the worldwide press coverage of the theft and the investigation that made the painting super famous.  The newspapers loved to roast the inept French police efforts to solve the crime.  At one point, Picasso was a suspect.  Peruggia was interviewed twice, but cleared because they just could not believe he was capable of doing it.  In 1513, Peruggia (using the name “Leonardo”) contacted an art dealer in Florence and offered to return the work to Italy for a reward of 500,000 lire.  When he arrived at the deal site with the painting in a suitcase, he was arrested.  He claimed his goal was not the money, but to return the painting to its native Italy.  He was considered a hero by many Italians and only served seven months in jail.

https://www.cnn.com/2013/11/18/world/europe/mona-lisa-the-theft/index.html

https://www.historytoday.com/archive/months-past/mona-lisa-stolen-louvre

A HENRY VIII BANQUET

  1. spit-roasted meat – usually pig or boar
  2. grilled beaver’s tale – this was popular on Fridays because you could not ear meat and beaver were classified as fish
  3. whale meat – another Friday staple;  it was common and thus cheap;  boiled or roasted
  4. whole-roasted peacock – the feathers would be stuck back after cooking for decoration
  5. internal organs – beef lungs, spleen, and udders
  6. black pudding – a type of sausage made by stuffing pigs’ intestines with boiled, congealed blood
  7. boar’s head – this was usually the centerpiece for Christmas banquets
  8. roasted swan –  this course was a symbol of the wealth of the nobility;  often served with a gold crown on the head
  9. vegetables – vegetables were associated with common folk and thus were not a big part of Henry’s diet
  10. marzipan – a paste made from almonds, sugar, and egg whites with cinnamon and pepper
  11. spiced fruitcakes – desserts were not a big deal, but this one was popular;  a dried pea or bean would be baked in, whoever found it was treated as the guest of honor for the rest of the banquet
  12. wine and ale – plenty of it!

                –  Amazing 572 – 3

FRANCIS BACON’S DEATH

The famous experimental philosopher was traveling by coach through a snowy landscape when he had a eureka moment involving freezing food to preserve it.  He stopped at a peasant’s hut and purchased a chicken.  He killed the bird and covered it with snow to see if his experiment would work.  Unfortunately, he caught a chill which cost him his life at age 65.

  •  Little, Brown  p.  32

THE GAME OF BOWLS

When the Spanish Armada was first sighted entering the English Channel, most of the British ship captains were at Plymouth playing a game of bowls.  The Lord Admiral Lord Howard of Effingham wanted to rush to the ships and put out to confront the Spanish, but Sir Francis Drake proclaimed “There is plenty of time to win the game and beat the Spaniards after.”  And they did.

  •  Little, Brown  p. 174

HISTORY OF APRIL FOOL’S DAY

Some historians trace April Fool’s Day back to France in the late 16th Century.  France converted to the Gregorian Calendar in 1582.  Under the Julian Calendar, French people celebrated New Year’s Day on April 1 in conjunction with the spring equinox.  With the switch, the French who continued that were considered to be slow thinkers.  They became the butt of jokes and hoaxes.  One popular prank was referred to as “poisson d’avril” (fish of April) referring to easily caught fish.  Paper fish would be put on a person’s back to the merriment of Jan. 1 celebrants. 

Around 1700 (some historians specify April 1, 1700), the British started what can be described as the modern version of April Fool’s Day.  The Brits had a tradition called “hunting the gowk”.  A gowk was a cuckoo bird.  On April 1 you would send the village idiots on phony errands.  You would taunt the rube with “April Fool!”  It was two-day affair as the next day (Tailie Day) was reserved for pranks involving asses.  The word serves a dual role as the pranks included placing fake tails on victims and “kick me” signs.  Let’s bring back Tailie Day!

https://www.history.com/topics/holidays/april-fools-day

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/April_Fools%27_Day

THE “NINE DAYS’ QUEEN”

                Jane Gray should have had the regular life of a noblewoman, but she became a political pawn and died at age 16.  She was born the daughter of a duke, but she had connections to the Tudor family.  She was great-granddaughter of Henry VII and grandniece of Henry VIII.  When he died, his sickly son Edward became Edward VI.  There was talk of Jane marrying Edward, but she ended up with Guildford Dudley.  Her father-in-law  was Lord Dudley, the Duke of Northumberland.  Northumberland actually ran the country.  Northumberland convinced Edward to change his will, cutting his sisters Mary and Elizabeth out, and naming Jane his heir.  Edward died in 1553 and on July 10, Jane was proclaimed Queen.  From this point on, she never left the Tower of London.  She ruled from there for nine days and then she was imprisoned there for several months.  Northumberland had underestimated the popularity of Mary Tudor, who as she marched to London gained support.  On July 19, she was arrested.  Northumberland was executed in August.  Jane was beheaded for high treason on Feb. 12, 1554.  But first, her husband was executed and his headless body paraded in front of her window.  Harsh.  In the end she was just a naïve little noble girl who got in way over her head, which she ended up losing.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Jane_Grey

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/tragic-story-englands-nine-day-queen-180964042/

THE FIRST OF SIX

                Henry VIII had six wives.  The best was his first.  Catherine of Aragon was born on Dec. 16, 1485 and went on to live a tragic life.  She was the daughter of Ferdinand and Isabella of Spain and that made her a valuable commodity.  She was betrothed to the son of Henry VII of England to keep the countries peaceful.  She was three at the time.  At age 15, she married future King Arthur, also 15.  They had met ten days earlier.  Six months later, her husband was dead, never having been king.  To keep the marriage alliance and to keep the dowry, she was shifted to Arthur’s younger brother and now heir Henry.  In 1508, they were married.  He was almost 18 and she was six years older.  The marriage seemed a good one and she was a good queen.  She served as Spain’s ambassador to England, the first female ambassador in European history.  When Henry was off fighting a war in France, he left her as regent.  King James of Scotland chose that time to invade.  She rode north in full armor, while pregnant, to address the troops and they went on to win the Battle of Flodden.  She sent her husband part of the dead James’ coat.  She was fertile and gave birth to three children.  But three babies were stillborn and a son and daughter died young.  Only a daughter named Mary survived.  In 1525, Henry fell in lust with Anne Boleyn.  That lust and the desire for a male heir caused Henry to ask the Pope for an annulment based on the Biblical prohibition that a man should not marry his brother’s wife.  When the Pope refused, Henry created his own church to get his divorce.  She was put under house arrest in a series of castles.  She wore a hair shirt the rest of her life.  She was forbidden to see her daughter.  In 1536, she died of cancer at age 51.  The day she died, Anne of Boleyn miscarried a baby boy.  I don’t know if she died with a smile on her face. 

https://www.thehistorypress.co.uk/articles/12-little-known-facts-about-catherine-of-aragon/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catherine_of_Aragon